SLOW PAGE TEST RESULTS
The "West Virginia Institute for the Study of Stuff" recently conducted a poll of 325,000 Dunkin Donut workers asking them what they would prefer over waiting for a slow website to load. The following are their findings:


TEST RU1-IM12:
Swallowing a live wasp: 99%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 1%

TEST IMAQT:
Tattoo of "I (heart) Barney" on your forehead: 84%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 16%

TEST URAQT:
Accidentally super gluing your hand to an anvil: 99.9%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 0.1%

TEST I8AB:
Having large "Kid Crayolas" shoved up your nostrils: 87%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 13%

TEST OIC1SMT:
Stuck in an elevator for ten hours with a mime: 93%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 7%

TEST IM1-UR12:
Getting your head dry shaved: 98%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 2%

TEST OK2BAQT:
Stepping barefoot in warm beetle dung: 92%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 8%

TEST I8AB-U8AB2:
Getting your head blown off with a sawed off shotgun: 1%
Waiting for a slow site to load: 99%