Welcome to the rejected archive. Please enjoy these inferior questions!
Write In vote for the first question I would have voted for Bill Gates falling out of a window.
A write in for 1 question..... Hanson crushed by a 5000 pound thusaurus. (Mmmplop!)
What the--- how did you get in my UNDERWEAR DRAWER? GET OUT NOW!
Ta ta babe.
Let's just be friends, oh it's not that I hate you or anything, I just, you know, don't have time for a relationship right now.
I'm not touching you with a 10 foot pole.
Well, I met this US President....
Somewhere where I don't have to look at his ugly face everyday!!!!!
Sue, Have I ever told you about the "operation"
- Joliet Jake-
I called Dr. Laura the other day and she suggested...
Are you my mother?
Sorry but I find you a waste of space!!
"For now I need a change of scenery"
-Kylie & Sherri B.-
Do I know you?
-Gary of the Jungle-
I have a STD and I really don't want you to contract it, so for this reason I feel we should break up.
Go away, you smell funny.
-Lord High Underling-
Let's try something new in our sex life...Do you like limburger cheese??
I'm leaving on a jet plane.
I'm pregnant (males only)
How many idiots like you does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
I'm sorry but, well, I've met a very special hamster and its, well, its gotten serious.
I am not sure. But running away from her while screaming might help!
go now! I'd rather masterbate till my hand disintigrates in a puff of smoke!
I really do love you very much.Thats why I feel I need to give you more space to explore your options.
I am sorry. I was only on leave and the hospital has asked that I come back for more 'foot drawings with crayons' lessons
Your sister says I have a really big P***S! She says you do too.
Hey, are you going to eat that? Then kiss my ass and don't call anymore.
Say, do you have worms too? Clinton asked me to be an intern.
I'm gonna play with your head like a drunk kitten.
Steven Wright (c/o Delilah Smud Puddle)
(To Parents, after girlfriend has said candid statement about relationship) Yeah, like last night when I jacked off all over you!
The Infamous Beaver
Have YOU ever tried running the greatest nation in the world when you are having an affair with someone that even Buddy (first dog) wouldn't even F***
REDDWARF (more prez. jokes)
My dog died. I'LL call you after the funeral.
The great "Barnaby Wild" strikes again
I have been sold to a tribe of African Pygmies, and my boat leaves at midnight.
Usually I just start singing "I hear voices but there's no one there" and then pull out a big bottle of Thorazine.
[sniff-sniff] you smell good, didja take a bath or somthin? and yer shirt... it looks kinda clean today
hi, my name is bill gates! i brought pie for us!
I'm sorry I don't think this goign to work out, me being possesed by bob the evil murdering ghost and all
DUH... Let's be friends.
Get out of my face bitch!
jamjars (THIS WEEK I HAVE BEEN MAINLY EATING PROZAC)
Look I swear you'll forget about me and I won't mean anything to you in 10 years!
it's not you it's me
It's just an infection; It will go way eventually
Hey Babe, you know how ya called me Superman? Well you're kryptonite
I am sorry, but, Fall comes early this year.
"I...I...I have this thing about Penelope Pitstop. I wonder if you could dress up as her tonight....?"
Mick "back" Galvin
I'm sorry but i'm seeing your father
Goodbye......hope to never see you again
please go and clean your self you smell like fish..
Bryan W. Regensburger
I'm sorry about not telling you this sooner, but........... I have fleas
Go away or I'll hit you with the waterspout I just stuck my dick in!
Matt "The Senior" Hare
do you like it when i don't shave?
simply say "You're about as beautiful as a bottle of warts on a busted sofa!!"!
Aren't your 15 minutes going to be up soon???????????
Don't you think I've been carrying you long enough???????
Mittens (or someone just like him)
I'm going to be a big famous person any day now, so I don't really need you anymore, do I? But don't worry, you'll do fine without me. I guess.
well, it's Mittens, isnt it???????
I'm not gay. My boyfriend is.
Your like the trash,.....dumped.
I don't like you
I'm sure this rash will go away soon...
I'm sorry but the mole on your back doesn't like me, It's over.
I think we need some pass.
I have leprosy.
Take a seoige catapult, put a twelve foot cheeze dip and live hamster ball, soak with liquid oxegen, and launch at your unwanted other.
"You know, since we met, my incisors have grown.
De Ole Sarge
"My sister is getting suspicious. I'm afraid I can't see you anymore." - Guy. (Opposite for girl.)
uummm....I like you and all, but I'm having a very emotional time, and I can't cope with a relationship right now.
SORT OF LIKE DIVING OF A DIVING BOARD
someone with no life
Once back in '52, I was kicked in the head by a horse. Best thing that eeeeevver happened to me.
I wish you had Cancer, Bitch!
after spending all this time with you I have realized I would rather be an intern in the white house
No, really, I mean it. You smell funny.
The Sacred Yurt
Those men in black told me not to talk to you anymore. They really scared me too.
The Man KY
will stop stalking me now please?
It an't you and it an't me, it's just, Yo quiero Taco Bell!
Baby, if you dont know how to lick it, then we are just going to kick it.
Put your pants BACK ON.
-A very disturbed person.-
I've got a wart on my tongue, do you know how it got there?
-William C. Spear (Willie)-
See the door? Use it!
see that rock on the ground, go crwal back under it and never come back out!
I just bought a new horse and I'm keeping him in Coney Island.
What did your doctor say about my STD? You didn't ask yet?!?!?!
I just want to ride my Harley,and stay High all the time
Did I ever tell you about my husband/wife?
"I really like you, but I can't stand that ripe pimple on your nose - it's been that way for months, and I'm afraid that it will stay there forever."
I loVED you. Promise!!
I have Genital Herpes
I have herpes.
Luis of el guapo de san lucia de los ninos de cabezos frijoles
You smell funny and i dont want to be near you anymore!
I think we should be "Friends"
Have I ever told you about my disease?
Lord High Underling
"you suck and i hope you die"
I'd love to keep seeing you, but, I, uh, have to floss the fish. Every day. For the next year.
Your belly button smells like swiss cheese, it's over.
If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
I have this contagious foot fungus that was only on my feet, but now has spread over my entire body, giving me warts oozing with puss. Would you like to have sex now?
I'm sorry, but I'm gay.....
I'm sorry, but you look too much like Hanson.....
Are you lactating? I am hungry.
- Elvis Shortliver -