wwwVOice Humor Zine Thing The Rejected Question Archive : #2 Welcome to the LAST page of the rejected archive. Please enjoy these inferior questions!

Since we know that cats always land on their feet and buttered toast always lands with the butter side down, what would happen if you strapped buttered toast to a cat's back (butter side up) and dropped the cat? -anonymous visitor- Really great question, couldn't find cat to volunteer for loony experiment. How do we know Sparky really isn't a U. S. hacker, and when we come to this site he infects our PC with a deadly virus. HUH!!! ANSWER THAT!!!!! LOSER!!!!! -Master Hang Hi Cho May Zow Cheesburger With Fries- Cripes! I've been found out. Why does the question box say, "Send US a question?" Can you spell skitzofrenia? Damn, neither can I. -Jadie- Didn't like question. Neither did I. WHY DO THEY CALL THEM PICK-UP TRUCKS WHEN THEY DON'T PICK UP ANYTHING- YOU HAVE TO PICK IT UP YOURSELF AND PUT IT ON THE TRUCK. CAN I SUE FOR FALSE ADVERTISEMENT? WHY DON'T THE PSYCHIC FRIENDS KNOW WHEN TO CALL ME? WHERE IS THE OTHER HALF OF A "SEMI"? WHY DOES THE WEATHER MAN GIVE YOU THE TEMPERATURE AT THE AIRPORT? ANYONE THERE IS LEAVING. WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? IF TWO PEOPLE ARE ARGUING ABOUT SOMETHING THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT, DO THEY KNOW TWICE AS MUCH OR TWICE AS LITTLE AS ONE PERSON TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING HE/SHE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT. WHAT DO YOU ADD TO POWDERED WATER? WHY MUST YOU PAY TO GET ON THE FREE-WAY. IS THERE A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A GENUINE CHEVRLET AND A CHEVROLET? OXYMORON - "DODGE RAM" TRUCK. IS A FRUIT COCKTAIL THE BEST FOOD FOR A HOMOSEXUAL. DID ADAM AND EVE HAVE BELLY BUTTONS? IF GOD IS THE ALMIGHTY AND IF GOD IS THE CREATOR, CAN GOD CREATE A ROCK HE CAN'T LIFT? WHY IS THERE ONLY ONE EXIT TO GO SEE "ENDLESS CAVERNS", SHENANDO! AH, VA? IF THEY ARE "EENDLESS", WHY CAN'T I GET TO THEM FROM ANY EXIT? WHY DO THEY CALL IT A TV SET WHEN YOU ONLY GET ONE? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DRIVE AN "AUTOMOBILE"? WHY ARE THEY CALLED MOBILE HOMES- THEY NEVER GO ANYWHERE? IS "THESAURUS" FOUND IN A THESAURUS? IF VCR IS FOR VIDEO CASSETTE RECORDER, WHY DON'T THEY ALSO MAKE VCP'S - VIDEO CASSETTE PLAYERS? WHY DO SO FEW PEOPLE USE COMPUTERS FOR COMPUTING? WHY ARE THEY CALLED BUILDINGS WHEN THEY HAVE ALREADY BEEN BUILT? -CHICO, (definately NOT RELATED to the LMS of the Internet, btw)- No time read big question. If you put an Artichoke heart on display at the national art gallery would it be called art because it has art in the title? Or would people be more likely to Choke at haveing seen the most distinguished vegetable in a gallery? -=Catalyst=- Heard same joke on laugh-in in '72. Sparky, do you think you look a little like Oprah? Do you think you act like her, too? -anonymous visitor- Don't know any Opras, lost TV in poker game. How is sound transfered across telephone lines? Really...How? -Dent Forward- Believe this may not be persons real name. Who would you rather have the wallet of: Ross Perot-Bill Gates. -anonymous visitor- Couldn't stand thought of viewing personal snapshot collection. Why doesn't my boss agree that spending all day reading THIS web page is a constructive and vital part of my employment ?? -(I would normally give my name, but my boss reads this site regularly, and I need the money from my job to pay my ISP so that I can carry on reading this page when I get home !)- Rule one: Never use a submission if the name is longer than the question. If you're in a car going the speed of light...are you really at all concerned with what your headlights are doing? -anonymous visitor- Spent all day Saturday, still couldn't find answer. Why does a chicken? -anonymous visitor- Seen one too many bad chicken questions, slowly loosing will to live. Why do we speak english is we live in america? -Brian Graham- No use question, like me not. If we had webbed feet, would we make webbed shoes? -anonymous visitor- Liked it a lot, so much so that I bought a duck. Didn't want to hurt new pet's feelings. How come when I tell some guy to f@$k off, he thinks i'm flirting with him -don't tell my parents i wrote this!!!- Still trying to promote family oriented site. Why did he fall on the nurse? -Spoogy- Believe Spoogy to be a psycho from his/her previous questions. If you had your choice, would you rather hang out in: a. RadioShack b. CompUSA c. Hewlett Packard Outlet Mall d. Edmund Scientific e. Gates Alive! f. The House o'AOL Discs g. Computer Land -NonyaBznz@aol.com- I'm actually living in "The House of AOL Disks" What if roses were blue? -John- Thought about doing some sort of poem like: "Roses are blue, Violets are blue..." Scrapped entire idea after eating overly hot buffalo wings. Attractive Capricorn-Female, 29, 5'8", 138 lbs, blonde/blue, ISO fun-loving leek. Possible LTR. 55135 -anonymous visitor- Have a date already. Not sure what "leek" is. Why are smurfs blue? -anonymous visitor- Did a Smurf question last month. Brother had bad Smurf/toothbrush accident. I we are all supposed to be mammels, what is Bill Gates? -anonymous visitor- Bill's coming over for dinner Tuesday, questions are posted Monday. Trying to avoid big fight this time. I have reason to believe that you are really a mutated 2 headed Elvis-Marilyn Monroe, care to come out of the closet? -anonymous visitor- Couldn't answer it, because it's true. If this makes the list of questions, will I get paid off? -anonymous visitor- Too political.

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