Why do doctors call their jobs a "practice"? I would prefer it if they finished practicing before they work on me.
-That Guy Who Keeps Sending Stupid Questions-
Dear Guy Who Keeps Sending Stupid Questions, have you met the weird girl who has been stalking me?
-Sparky-

Why is quicksand so slow?
-anonymous visitor-
I think if you thrash around a bit it will go much faster.
-Spanky-

If a man dies halfway through signing his divorce papers is his "wife" considered a widow or half of one? (Couldn't find this in the law books.)
-Joe the divorce attorney-
Dear Joe, what do you care, you still get paid. Hey Joe, what's the difference between a dead lawyer and a dead skunk in the middle of the road? There's skid marks next to the skunk.
-Sparky-

In the fairy tale "Rapunzel", the prince tells her to "let down her long hair" so that he can use her hair as a ladder to climb up the tower to save her. I was wondering, how could they get out of the tower if her hair is connected to her head? Also, wouldn't her neck break from the weight of the prince when he is climbing?
-GuessW.-
Let's see if I've got this straight. You're wondering why three bears would have silverware, no wait, you wanted to know where you can get magic apples that make people sleep for years and years and then POOF, one kiss and you wake up, or was it something about how to make a little boy out of two-by-fours..... Actually, I think he brought a ladder.
-Sparky-

When you leave an unopened container of margarine in the trunk of your car for one month it never rots it stays just the same as when you put it in and if you leave a margarine tub without the protective seal and a package of frozen lima beans in the trunk of your car both rot. Would this happen without the lima beans?
-anonymous visitor-
Probably, was it a foreign car?
-Spanky-

If you had a life, what would you be doing?
-anonymous visitor-
Let's see, what was I doing before the web, I seem to recall something about a cure for Cancer, and I had this replacement for wood thing going in my basement so I could save the rainforests..... Oh well.
-Sparky-

Maybe I am being paranoid, but does it strike you as scary that the "p" at the beginning of the word psycho is so damned silent???
-concerned citizen-
It is scary. One day you'll probably see the letter K outlined in chalk on the pavement and the letter Q will be saying something like "He was a quiet letter, sort of cept to himself"
-Sparky-
(no that's not a typo)