The Ow! Cartoon Contest Last week we forced our visitors to come up with a cartoon caption for the following picture. We would like to thank everybody that participated, and hope they all seek professional help as soon as possible. THE WINNERS Sparky: "If you pull the lever on that typewriter, it'll flip you the bird." -Xine- So THAT's where white out comes from! -Rampage- The repeating typewriter, for those who stutter. -MadSector- 'a s d f g h j k l m n o p' 'AWK! a s d f g h j k l m n o polly wants a cracker!' -um, it's so dumb i'd rather not say...- Sparky: Should I give him a cracker or a piece of paper so he can tell me what he wants? Spanky: Why does he need paper? Parrots can talk. Parrot: No I can't. -The Lamer- I don't have a funny question, but I would like to analyze the picture. It seems to me that Spanky is getting a little too funny for the old Sparkster so he's firing her and hiring a parrot to take her place. He's hiring the parrot because it will repeat everything he says and he'll seem twice as funny. Am I right? -Cherries- Sparky: Is he the one writing all the fowl language? -Acorn- The guy at the store said this was better than a typewriter ribbon. -Hugh Miliated- Sparky: Is that the parrot that gave you those bad RAMEN noodles? Spanky: What RAMEN noodles? Sparky: The ones that killed you. Spanky: What's a parrot? -BrownShoe- Spanky: "Hey Sparky, I couldn't help but think that if we only had appendages, we might be able to help that parrot not die a horrible death by being eaten alive by a typewriter!" Sparky: "Yeah.......hey did you see that gorgeous babe just walk by!!!" -The Wicked Wench of the West- Sparky: I think we need a new onion. Spanky: Maybe that guy will be the third onion. Sparky: He's not an onion, he's a parrot. Spanky: Same thing. Sparky: Ever since you've died you've been as sharp as a basketball. Spanky: What's a basketball? -Lamer- Spanky: What's that parrot doing here? Sparky: And what about that typewriter he just pooped up? Parrot: Man, I feel better! -Matt "The Senior" Hare- And for those who dare: The Rejected Captions