Kraft Breaded Shrimp & Cheese Dogs Corporation
(Formerly Kraft Fortune Cookie & Kiwi Corporation)

Joan Promoted To Mail Boy
For no apparent reason, Wednesday, Joan was named Mail Boy at Kraft Corporation . In a display of incredibly bad judgment, the board misfired again and chose probably the least qualified person for this newly created position. Please give a warm welcome to Joan , as Joan settles in and throws out all the last guy's stuff. Additionally, all employees are asked to try to control their emotions enough not to do anything to Joan's car. Thanks.

Joan Promises Better Cheese Dogs
Due to the vast amount of rejected Cheese Dogs , Mail Boy Joan has promised to fire everybody he sees during the upcoming tour of Kraft Corporation. While this may seem drastic to many people, Joan claims that it's the best way to make sure that inferior Cheese Dogs never leave the plant. Confidence in this new plan is so high that, Joan has vowed to eat any rejected Breaded Shrimps or Cheese Dogs at Kraft.

Kraft, Making Your Life Better With Cheese Dogs

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